Five Crazy Government Experiments


Announcer: Welcome to Stuff You Should Know from HowStuffWorks.com.

Josh Clark: Hey, and welcome to the podcast. I'm Josh Clark. There's Charles W. Chuck Bryant. Say hey, Chuck.

Chuck Bryant: Hey Chuck.

Josh Clark: That makes this Stuff You Should Know.

Chuck Bryant: That's such an old joke.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: Terrible.

Josh Clark: Still, it's got a lot of -

Chuck Bryant: Staying power.

Josh Clark: Sure.

Chuck Bryant: And little else.

Josh Clark: It has as much staying power as cat urine. Chuck, you want to hear the history of the microwave oven?

Chuck Bryant: I'd love to.

Josh Clark: In 40 seconds or less.

Chuck Bryant: All right.

Josh Clark: Back in 1947, a guy named Percy Spencer was touring the labs of the Raytheon Corporation when he passed by a magnetron.

Chuck Bryant: If he had un-popped popcorn in his pocket, then I'm leaving right now.

Josh Clark: We'll get to that.

Chuck Bryant: Okay.

Josh Clark: That doesn't count against my 40 second time.

Chuck Bryant: I thought popcorn popped in his pocket or something.

Josh Clark: No, he had a chocolate bar in his pocket, and it melted.

Chuck Bryant: Oh really?

Josh Clark: And he said what the hell's going on here. So he actually ran and got a bag of popping corn and it started popping too. And then, he finished the whole thing off, spectacularly, by getting a pot and a raw egg and holding it near the magnetron, and it exploded into his buddy's face.

Chuck Bryant: Wow, and he died a short time later?

Josh Clark: Anyway, he figured out that this thing was producing microwaves. No, he lived to be an old man. But he figured out that this was producing microwaves, and he put it in an invention. So everybody who has a microwave oven today has a tiny magnetron in their house.

Chuck Bryant: He put it in an invention?

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: That's a unique way of saying that. Good for him.

Josh Clark: Anyway, the point of this is that's the Raytheon Corporation where this discovery was made. And the Raytheon Corporation was largely a government funded outfit.

Chuck Bryant: Ah.

Josh Clark: So we would call that a government experiment, of sorts.

Chuck Bryant: Sure.

Josh Clark: It's not the craziest, though, Chuck.

Chuck Bryant: Not even close.

Josh Clark: No, you want to talk about some crazy government experiments, maybe five of them today?

Chuck Bryant: It sounds like a great idea.

Josh Clark: All right. Let's do it, man.

Chuck Bryant: This was written by Robert Lamb of Stuff from the Science Lab, we should point out.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: I hope we're not stealing this article. Is he going to do this at some point?

Josh Clark: I didn't even ask him. I'm that he wanted to, but it's too late now.

Chuck Bryant: What's the first one here, Josh, about transplanting heads onto other bodies?

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: Let's talk about that.

Josh Clark: Yeah, because think about it, Chuck. Think about the applications of this. Technically, if you don't look at it as a head transplant, you can make the case that this is a full body transplant.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, it depends on if you're the chicken or the egg, I guess.

Josh Clark: Definitely.

Chuck Bryant: Does that make sense?

Josh Clark: A little. We'll find out when the people write in. But this is something that we could definitely use.

Chuck Bryant: If we could attach the spinal cord.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: But we cannot.

Josh Clark: Is that the thing that's holding it back?

Chuck Bryant: Well that's the thing that keeps the result from being a quadriplegic.

Josh Clark: Oh.

Chuck Bryant: But they said the applications, maybe, if someone just wants to live, they'd rather live as a quadriplegic than die.

Josh Clark: Yeah, okay, especially if you're already a quadriplegic and you're used to it, but you have organ failure.

Chuck Bryant: Hey, that's pretty random.

Josh Clark: Just think about it. We talked about Braille. What if you are blind and handless?

Chuck Bryant: I guess you use the e-readers that read things to you.

Josh Clark: Oh, okay.

Chuck Bryant: Out loud.

Josh Clark: Chuck, this idea of full body transplantation does have its roots in government experiments.

Chuck Bryant: Yes, indeed.

Josh Clark: Specifically as far back as 1908, when a U.S. surgeon named Charles Guthrie decided that he wanted to find out if he could put one dog's head on another dog's body. And by God, Chuck Bryant has a picture of it, the two headed dog.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, he actually did this and it was not replacing one head with another, like you said. He attached -

Josh Clark: Clearly not.

Chuck Bryant: He attached a dog's head underneath the chin of the other dog, so they were, in fact, chin to chin.

Josh Clark: And the other dog was like (inaudible).

Chuck Bryant: Right. So he actually did this. And I don't know if you want to say it worked because the second head could only.

Josh Clark: Loll about.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, they said that there were some just normal reflex reactions and sounds, but not dog type sounds.

Josh Clark: Yeah, it couldn't fetch a paper or anything, right?

Chuck Bryant: Yeah.

Josh Clark: So I guess you could make the case, though, that that was successful. At the very least, they got a pretty cool picture out of it.

Chuck Bryant: Well, blood flowed from one head to the other through the brain and then back out.

Josh Clark: That's pretty cool.

Chuck Bryant: It worked, in a way.

Josh Clark: Are you going to post that pic on the blog?

Chuck Bryant: No, it's gross.

Josh Clark: Please.

Chuck Bryant: No way.

Josh Clark: So that was the first one. That's 1908. That's pretty old-timey, right?

Chuck Bryant: Indeed.

Josh Clark: And then we cut to 1951, when the Soviets are saying oh, the Americans are doing it, well we've got to do it, too.

Chuck Bryant: There was a lot of that going on back then.

Josh Clark: There really was. And actually, before that, there was an experiment in the 40s, right?

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: This thing is on You Tube. If you type in experiments in the revival of dead organisms, you're going to find a 1940s instructional film-esque film. Did you like that?

Chuck Bryant: Yeah.

Josh Clark: That shows people killing dogs and reviving them.

Chuck Bryant: I'm not going to watch it then.

Josh Clark: And apparently - well it's not very graphic. It's more like here, have some cyanide, dog. And then they bring the dog back. Also, supposedly, you could just barely see it that it's a dog's head that's moving and responding and everything, but it's being kept alive externally through like an artificial heart and lungs.

Chuck Bryant: Wow.

Josh Clark: Pumping blood into the brain and back out for circulation.

Chuck Bryant: I don't need to see that.

Josh Clark: They don't show a good shot of it, so it's possible it's a trick. But I was reading a post on it that showed that this stuff was real. They actually did kill this dog and revive it. It was very scientific. It wasn't a joke or a hoax.

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: So we have been able to -

Chuck Bryant: Was that Vladimir or was that someone else?

Josh Clark: I think it was Vladimir. It was the Soviet's.

Chuck Bryant: He was a sick puppy.

Josh Clark: He was.

Chuck Bryant: Yes, and speaking of puppy, he did the same dog thing, where he transplanted 20 puppy h eads with head, shoulders, lungs, forelimbs and an esophagus that emptied outside of the dog, transplanted them onto other dogs.

Josh Clark: Cool.

Chuck Bryant: And some of them lived. One lived as long as 29 days. And they actually, there's some log notes here. 9:00 a.m., donors head eagerly drank water or milk and tugged as if trying to separate itself from the recipient's body.

Josh Clark: Nice.

Chuck Bryant: And one of them bit one of the staff members, which was my favorite part.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: And one of them bit the other dog on the ear, and the dog tried to shake it off.

Josh Clark: Crazy.

Chuck Bryant: So there were actual dog things happening.

Josh Clark: Yeah. That's pretty puppy-esque.

Chuck Bryant: And awful. It sickens - I didn't even want to talk about this.

Josh Clark: Really?

Chuck Bryant: It sickens me, yeah.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: Really? Dead puppy heads on other dogs?

Josh Clark: It's like the cutest horrific experiment ever.

Chuck Bryant: Oh, it's awful.

Josh Clark: The only way it could be cuter is if they transplanted unicorn heads.

Chuck Bryant: There were pictures of this, but I couldn't even go there.

Josh Clark: Well, Chuck, this horrible type of experimentation culminated in 1970, when an American neurosurgeon, named Robert J. White, transplanted the living head of one monkey onto the headless body of another, and it worked. And he was almost bitten by the monkey. That's how they considered this a success. Apparently, everybody in the lab cheered when the monkey tried to bite the guy. And then after a week, they put it down.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, so good for these crazy, crazy people.

Josh Clark: And meanwhile, of course, the Soviets and the Americans were shooting chimps into space, never to return again. And you know they're up there still.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, little chimp bodies, or bones, probably, at this point.

Josh Clark: And some in space capsules. Well you have to wonder. What kind of process of physical degradation does a monkey undergo after death in space?

Chuck Bryant: I don't know.

Josh Clark: Answe r me.

Chuck Bryant: I don't know.

Josh Clark: All right. Let's move on, Chuck.

Chuck Bryant: Please.

Josh Clark: To acoustic kitty, more animal abuse.

Chuck Bryant: Well, it actually is. And this was courtesy, once again, of the Cold War. The U.S. and Soviet super power, battling each other for position. And the CIA spent maybe as much as 20 million, at least 10 million, so we'll just settle on 15.

Josh Clark: In five years.

Chuck Bryant: In five years, to implant listening devices into a cat, complete with battery and an antenna in the tail.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: Little acoustic kitty is what they called it.

Josh Clark: And it was a single cat. They alternately surgically outfitted it with eavesdropping devices, and tried to train it. 'Cause think about it. The presence of the cat is not the most - cat's wander into places. They kind of go wherever they want, so it makes sense. The logic is there.

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: To an extent, but apparently the cat was a little too willful for this. They figured out that it went off and just kind of left whenever it got hungry. So they tried to surgically manipulate its sense of hunger, so it wouldn't get hungry as often.

Chuck Bryant: Indeed.

Josh Clark: And then finally, Chuck, it threw itself under a cab.

Chuck Bryant: Well, you know why.

Josh Clark: Why?

Chuck Bryant: It was the kitty, acoustic kitty's first test mission. They sent the little kitty on its first eavesdropping mission to eavesdrop on these two Russian men in a park.

Josh Clark: Really?

Chuck Bryant: In a public park, and so they dropped the cat off and then that's when the cat ran in front of the cab and got killed.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: Which is not funny at all?

Josh Clark: No.

Chuck Bryant: Because I have cats too.

Josh Clark: It's bad enough to watch a cat get hit by a car. But imagine a $10 million cat that you spent five years training get hit by a car on its first mission.

Chuck Bryant: That's the part that I think was funny was the egg on the face of the U.S. Government.

Josh Clark: And there was egg plenty and they kept it under wraps until 2001 when that stuff was declassified.

Chuck Bryant: Yes, but still partially censored. I read part of it. All the fun words are blanked over.

Josh Clark: Right.

Chuck Bryant: Like who was doing it. Actually there was one part left in there, CIA officer Victor Marchetti, he addressed the hunger thing. He said they put in a wire to thwart the hunger. I don't even know what that means.

Josh Clark: Yeah, I read that as well, and I don't know how you would do that.

Chuck Bryant: How do you wire a cat up?

Josh Clark: Was there like a keeping ghrelin out?

Chuck Bryant: I have no idea, probably. So, also awful because it involves animals!

Josh Clark: Chuck.

Chuck Bryant: Josh.

Josh Clark: Have you ever heard of zero point energy?

Chuck Bryant: I have.

Josh Clark: Had you before today?

Chuck Bryant: No.

Josh Clark: I hadn't either.

Chuck Bryant: What is that, Josh?

Josh Clark: So from what I can gather, it's something that comes out of quantum mechanics. It's not supposed to happen under classical physics, but in quantum physics, it does. And apparently, innate energy that a particle has, even after all other external energies are removed.

Chuck Bryant: Okay.

Josh Clark: Right, say in a vacuum.

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: So they figure out that this means that particles have innate energy. But one of the, I guess, more surprising aspects of reducing a particle to zero point energy is that they kind of come in and out of existence, randomly.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah.

Josh Clark: Which is not supposed to happen?

Chuck Bryant: Sure.

Josh Clark: But apparently, it's especially susceptible to it when you completely remove gravity.

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: And this pursuit, the pursuit of figuring out how to use zero gravity machines to wink things in and out of existence was supposedly a Nazi experiment.

Chuck Bryant: Right and the Nazi's were famous for many, many odd, unproven, unsubstantiated experiments that they may or may not have conducted. This one is real. The Nazi Bell is what they called it.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: It's what Dr. Cook called it.

Josh Clark: Yeah, and Dr. Cook is Nick Cook, right?

Chuck Bryant: Yes, Josh.

Josh Clark: The Jane's Defense Weekly editor, who kind of went off the deep end. I read a book review on Salon of his book. He was a very, very respected journalist, but he really got into conspiratorial world with this one.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, he wrote the book, The Hunt for Zero Point, where he broke it all down, basically, and alleged that this all happened. And he's not some crackpot, or he wasn't at the time.

Josh Clark: Right, no.

Chuck Bryant: So he was a respected dude.

Josh Clark: Well he believes that an SS Officer, in charge of the V2 Rocket program, which eventually got the U.S. to the moon, 'cause don't forget, we, under operation Project Paperclip, we drafted tons of Nazi's scientists, including Wernher von Braun, who got us to the moon.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, thank you Vern.

Josh Clark: Yeah. And apparently, the guy who was running the V2 Rocket program traded this information about zero gravity or zero point energy to the U.S. And Cook's whole point is some guy comes up with this real method of using an antigravity machine for a military application. And he, I guess, came up with a file from someone in the Defense Department, saying there's no real scientific, or there's no military application here.

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: So Cook's premise was there totally was and they wouldn't have said that if they didn't already know how to do it.

Chuck Bryant: Well, of course.

Josh Clark: So he was saying that we knew how to do that and that the whole Foo Fighter phenomenon, UFO sightings, all that is evidence of us having figured out zero point gravity.

Chuck Bryant: How about that.

Josh Clark: It's crazy.

Chuck Bryant: And I did a little extra digging around, and I found out there's this guy, named Tim Ventura. And he runs something called American Antigravity. And he claims, this is five years ago and as usual, when you can't find follow up info, it's usually not a good sign.

Josh Clark: No.

Chuck Bryant: But he claims five years ago that a fellow, named John Dering, of SARA, the Scientific Applications Research Associates, who actually have a lot of government contracts, they're not crackpots either. They, supposedly, replicated key elements of the Nazi Bell technology, antigravity propulsion. And they, supposedly, recreated this like five years ago and they were looking for funding and were too secretive to get the funding that they needed. And it was kind of up in the air, last I checked.

Josh Clark: From what I understand and I don't know if it's necessarily zero point gravity, but using quantum mechanics, people have figured out how to get discs to levitate.

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: So it's not outside of the realm of possibilities.

Chuck Bryant: He's got stuff on the You Tube.

Josh Clark: Does he?

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, but so does David Blain. He's a big phony.

Josh Clark: What?

Chuck Bryant: No, Josh, he doesn't levitate. It's a trick.

Josh Clark: What? Let's talk about sex, baby, in space.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, sex in space, they have researched this behind closed doors, obviously. Although NASA says that they've never done such a thing. But clearly they have because they want to colonize the moon and space one day. You've got to know everything.

Josh Clark: Remember we talked about will the doomsday, the lunar doomsday ark save humanity that they were going to have their sexy business up there if they had to wait a century.

Chuck Bryant: Stephen Hawking said it's essential for human survival. It depends on being able to procreate in space.

Josh Clark: Okay, in space. I was going to say, you don't have to be Stephen Hawking to realize that. You've got to reproduce, or else the species dies out, right, no matter whether we're here, in orbit or on the moon or on Mars or wherever, right?

Chuck Bryant: Sure.

Josh Clark: So yes, of course NASA would engage in this kind of stuff. Specifically, there was a guy, named Pierre Kohler, who's a French astronomer. And he wrote a book in 2000 called The Last Mission. And they said that four years earlier, NASA checked out ten different zero gravity sexual positions on a 1996 mission. NASA says nuh-uh, and Pierre Kohler was like uh-huh. And that's pretty much where it ended.

Chuck Bryant: I feel stupid. I didn't even know there were ten, here on earth.

Josh Clark: Yeah. No?

Chuck Bryant: No.

Josh Clark: I'll draw you some pictures later.

Chuck Bryant: Okay. And obviously, like everything else, the Soviets have done the same with their cosmonauts, supposedly.

Josh Clark: What do they call them?

Chuck Bryant: Cosmonauts?

Josh Clark: No, the research into sex, the type of sexual positions.

Chuck Bryant: Oh, I don't know.

Josh Clark: Human docking procedures.

Chuck Bryant: Well, that's what Robert called it, I think.

Josh Clark: He put it in quotes.

Chuck Bryant: I thought that meant he was just making a wry joke. We'll have to ask him.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: But I love that, human docking procedure, sure. Russian Cosmonaut, Valenta, Valentina Tereshkova got pregnant in 1974 by another cosmonaut. So there were some that said this was probably A) maybe not done in space, but done just to see - like set up just to see what happened, like has his sperm been affected, has her uterus been affected, whatever. But it all turned out fine. Their baby was completely normal.

Josh Clark: Right.

Chuck Bryant: So that's a good sign.

Josh Clark: And some wonder if, possibly, that union wasn't a science experiment, in and of itself, just to find out.

Chuck Bryant: Maybe so.

Josh Clark: But yeah, we have such a little grasp on what the effects of zero gravity have on the human body.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, exactly.

Josh Clark: That it's a worthwhile look.

Chuck Bryant: It could be a sperm killer. Who knows?

Josh Clark: It could do all sorts of crazy stuff. Like remember the sarcopenia episode?

Chuck Bryant: Oh yeah.

Josh Clark: Where the neurons, the type of neurons that die off and are replaced or taken over by the other type neurons happens the opposite to astronauts who've been in zero gravity.

Chuck Bryant: Oh, that's right.

Josh Clark: Than it does, here on earth.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah.

Josh Clark: Who would expect that?

Chuck Bryant: Sure. So you've got to test it out.

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: Have you heard of the 2 suit?

Josh Clark: No.

Chuck Bryant: It's the number two suit. I don't know why it was invented by an actress and poet, but it was. Her name is Vanna Bonta, and she invented this suit that, basically, keeps two people attached. You can put two suits together, if you know what I'm saying.

Josh Clark: Oh yeah.

Chuck Bryant: To make one suit.

Josh Clark: Wow.

Chuck Bryant: And there's zippers and there's Velcro and there's openings and there's places to go.

Josh Clark: Cool.

Chuck Bryant: Within this suit.

Josh Clark: And each one has a cigarette tucked in to like the arm.

Chuck Bryant: Exactly. And the idea is to stabilize human proximity, so you can stay attached without much effort, so you can save your effort for coitus.

Josh Clark: How much are they?

Chuck Bryant: I don't know if you can buy them. And I don't know if the government said hey, give me some of those 2 suits. It sounds like -

Josh Clark: They gave us Tang.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, exactly, so let's get the 2 suit out there.

Josh Clark: And let's get to the last one, shall we, buddy?

Chuck Bryant: Sure.

Josh Clark: The psychic Cold War.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, did you see Men Who Stare at Goats?

Josh Clark: I loved that movie.

Chuck Bryant: I didn't see it.

Josh Clark: I loved it. It got like a 47 percent, pretty much across the board, half and half. It was a good movie.

Chuck Bryant: Was it based on this, or was it just fanciful goings on of George Clooney?

Josh Clark: No, I'm writing a blog post on this today. There really was a program that this thing was kind of based on. The characters were based on real life people. Yeah, I'll show it to you.

Chuck Bryant: So we're talking about psychic spies, right?

Josh Clark: Yeah, both the Soviets and the Americans were engaged in paranormal research.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah.

Josh Clark: The Soviets since the 20s, and then the U.S. in the 40s or 50s was like uh-oh, we better catch up with this, and never did.

Chuck Bryant: They're reading our minds, so we need to read their minds.

Josh Clark: Exactly. And there's a ton of applications for this for the military.

Chuck Bryant: Oh sure.

Josh Clark: Like for example, if you're manning a submarine, and you can't surface, why don't you just send whatever information you need, using your mind, into the mind of somebody else.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah. Or why get out of bed?

Josh Clark: Yeah.

Chuck Bryant: That's what I would do.

Josh Clark: That's a great one, too.

Chuck Bryant: I'd just beam my messages everywhere.

Josh Clark: A man machine interface where we could, basically, psychically link ourselves to a computer to interact with it.

Chuck Bryant: Okay, me like-y.

Josh Clark: Upload or download data.

Chuck Bryant: So does this stuff work, though, Josh?

Josh Clark: I don't know.

Chuck Bryant: Is it real? It's real that they did the research.

Josh Clark: They definitely did do the research. And in 1973, the Rand Corporation was asked to create a brief study on who was doing better at it, and the Rand Corporation said the Soviets, big time.

Chuck Bryant: Right.

Josh Clark: Soviets were much more investigatory with the biological, the physiological aspects of this, the basis of it, whereas with Americans, it was psychology, all psychological based. Theory and practice were kept separate with America. In the Soviet study, they came up with theories and then tested them. It was really scientific. So if anybody was going to get anywhere with it, the Rand Corporation concluded that it was definitely going to be the Soviets.

Chuck Bryant: Well good for the Ruskies.

Josh Clark: Yeah, they still are.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, and we had Operation, or Project Stargate going until 1995.

Josh Clark: Explain.

Chuck Bryant: So that was - well that's remote viewing, basically. And at one point, Operation Stargate had 22 active military and/or private remote viewers on staff.

Josh Clark: That's pretty cool.

Chuck Bryant: That is pretty cool.

Josh Clark: I wonder how much that pays.

Chuck Bryant: Remote viewing?

Josh Clark: Mm-hmm.

Chuck Bryant: I bet it pays pretty good, specialized.

Josh Clark: I bet you can pretty much demand whatever salary you want. It's like oh yeah, well go hire somebody else then, buddy.

Chuck Bryant: Right. Go down to the Home Depot, those guys hanging out front. See if they can remote view for you.

Josh Clark: Well that's about it for crazy government experiments. I think there's probably a ton more on the site though. Obviously the CIA experimented with LSD, buddy.

Chuck Bryant: Yeah, well that's number one on our list. That's why I got a whole podcast for that one.

Josh Clark: All you have to do is type maybe government and experiments in the handy search bar at HowStuffWorks.com. And that leads us to listener mail.

Chuck Bryant: Josh, I've got a couple of quick ones today.

Josh Clark: Okay.

Chuck Bryant: This one is from Sasha, a.k.a. Sparky. And Sasha Sparky says a recent podcast mentioned Pica and that's when you eat things that aren't food and it reminded me of my own five-year-old cravings. As a young girl, I had an insatiable graving for match heads.

Josh Clark: Huh, sulfur, huh?

Chuck Bryant: Uh-huh, I guess so. I would bite down on the matches and scrape off the heads and eat them. I kept a secret stash of pilfered matches under my pillow. I distinctly remember the salty, sulfurous flavor and chalky texture. I'm not sure anyone in my family caught on, and I apparently outgrew it, eventually. I'm not sure if this is unique Pica craving or not. I just thought I'd share it.

Josh Clark: Well.

Chuck Bryant: From Sasha Sparky, a.k.a. the match eater. Maybe that's why she's Sparky.

Josh Clark: Yeah, I'll bet, either that or her love of sulfur just developed into a love of arson.

Chuck Bryant: And this one is from Tony, and you're going to like this one. I don't know if you actually read this. 1:00 a.m., Tony wrote us. He is a business director for Gamma Vacuum. And he says guys, just thought you might like to know that I am sending an e-mail from a hotel in Geneva, Switzerland and have a couple of meetings tomorrow at CERN.

Josh Clark: Awesome.

Chuck Bryant: Trying to sell them our vacuum pumps, basically, the large hadron collider guy.

Josh Clark: He's a traveling vacuum salesman.

Chuck Bryant: And he just said he wanted to know that one of - he is a traveling vacuum salesman. He said he just wanted to let us know that one of the Stuff You Should Know army foot soldiers is on the premises, conducting business.

Josh Clark: Good for him. Thank you, Tony.

Chuck Bryant: And then he sent back a follow-up e-mail after I e-mailed him and said that he wants Jeri to say Hi, and she refuses. But he requested it. Is it against her religion? I would respect that, but out of my own self-interest, and not to look like a jackass. I'm not sure what that means. And that's pretty much it. Maybe a horse whiney, a sound effect, just to know that she's there is what he says.

Josh Clark: Jeri is going with against her religion thing, it looks like.

Chuck Bryant: Okay.

Josh Clark: She remains mute.

Chuck Bryant: That coupled with a good horse whiney will get you places.

Josh Clark: Neigh. Is that a good horse whiney?

Chuck Bryant: Yes, and it's actually Amish for no.

Josh Clark: Wow. If you have ever seen the movie, The Thing With Two Heads, and want to tell us what you thought about it, you just go ahead an send that in an e-mail. Also, if you're going to CERN, we definitely want to hear about that, as well. You can e-mail us at StuffPodcast@HowStuffWorks.com.Announcer: For more on this and thousands of other topics, visit HowStuffWorks.com. Want more How Stuff Works? Check out our blogs on the HowStuffWorks.com home page.